Story by Kimberly Davis
Photo courtesy of Flickr
When discussing what is important to a growing relationship, a few key components come to mind: trust, communication, and joy. Surely a relationship must have these three things to survive, but how do these things change when you add a few hundred miles to the equation?
The answer is that they shouldn’t. Long distance relationships have a bad reputation for being hard to handle. However, many people still find a way to work through them. Although they may require more dedication and planning than a short distance relationship, there is an upside. Distance is not forever. In fact, for many, distance plays only a small part in the entirety of the relationship. So whether you are twenty or two thousand miles apart, remember that the distance will only be as difficult as you make it.
With this in mind, the best advice I can give is that creativity is the key to a successful long distance relationship. In the past, people could communicate over a long distance only through letters or telegrams. In today’s day and age we are not subjected to the torture of the waiting game. Communication has become instantaneous and there is no excuse not to take advantage of that.
With so many vessels of communication at our disposal, this is where creativity comes into play. Every relationship is unique and it is important to keep this uniqueness alive by finding new ways to enjoy each other via the internet or telephones. Something I have enjoyed while spending the summer months away from my significant other is watching movies simultaneously. Every few days, we plan a date, pick a movie, make our popcorn, grab our favorite snacks, and Skype. Doing this makes the distance feel less extreme and it’s a lot of fun to have what feels like a normal date night. Of course, if you get stuck thinking about fun ways to keep in touch, a great website to visit is lovingfromadistance.com. This website is a great source for fun, creative, and quirky ideas to spice things up during the time you spend away from each other.
Distance is not an easy thing to overcome. It takes a lot of patience and perseverance. However, it does not have to be the most difficult thing you encounter. There are a lot of ways to make it fun, and for many, all you need is a telephone. We are lucky to live in a time where the ability to communicate is easy. All you have to do is tailor it to your needs. This is easier for some than others, but just like anything else in a relationship, it takes work.
Something that creates a lot of problems in a long distance relationship is becoming a paranoid, controlling, or obsessive person. I myself have been guilty of embodying all three qualities, and caused a lot of damage to my previous relationship. It is not fun for either partner when jealousy and control becomes an overpowering factor in your relationship. Keep in mind that you want to enjoy the person you are with and be enjoyed in return. Jealousy creates tension and this is distracting from the fun that could be had. Trust your significant other and things will be easier for both of you.
You shouldn’t have to feel like you are suffering through a long distance relationship. There are so many positive things that can be taken away from them and so many ways to keep the love alive. Plan special date nights and keep all of them. Send sweet nothings to your lover as often as you can, but most importantly, do not doubt your relationship. Distance is only a stepping stone and it does not last forever. Summer vacations, studying abroad, and other instance in which you’ll be separated should not define your relationship. If you get creative enough, a long distance relationship doesn’t have to be the death sentence that so many couples think it is.